Feeding My Son to the Great Pressure-Cooker Schooling System

So we finally decided to feed our son to the Great Indian Schooling System. Because, that’s how we secure his distant future as a Political Leader, Doctor, Engineer, Banker or Teacher – Chronologically in the order of financial prosperity and social recognition. So aligning with the conventions, we ceremoniously took uncountable pictures of him in his school dress, school bag, water bottle, et all, on the first session day. Next, we also posted them on Facebook and received 100+ Likes from many people I have never known personally. It was one of those special Life-Moments.

When School Mommies United to Form a WhatsApp Group

Within the first month after the online classes started with much galore, most of the school mommies unanimously agreed to form an independent and private WhatsApp Group. To upkeep the quality benchmarks of these groups,  Mommies from other class-sections are not invited. Unless ofcourse a mommies has two kids from different classes. On the other hand, Mommies who humbly decline invitations from the group leaders, are often perceived as snobbish. Their reluctance to join the union is unpardonable.

These aren’t the groups where you share Good Morning messages and forwarded pristinely inspirational Modi speeches. These are WhatsApp groups where school mommies vent their concerns to issues such as:

• Piling homework.
• School timing.
• Unwarranted spike in school fees.
• Teachers not paying equal attention to each student and how some students aren’t awarded enough smileys.

These are issues which demands a collaborative effort. Away from the preying eyes of the school teachers. Because revolutionary conversations demand a platform that’s free from the administrative atrocities and authoritative processes.

And since we are humans, the group often deviates from their conventional discussions to address other social matters. Such as mother-in-laws, maid problems, Myntra sale, Hair-fall problems, etc.

School Mommies WhatsApp Groups – Inspiring the Future

These are groups that inspire parents to push their wards harder and harder, until the Nursery kid finds that supreme streak of determination to become Firefighters, Astronauts or Policemen of the future (because that’s what most YouTube cartoons comprise of). Some of the smarter kids with more smileys might even aspire to be the next Dexter, Captain America or Wonder Woman. These groups are a perennial source of physiological and intellectual nourishments that NCERT failed to deliver.

M1: “Mrs. M2, You son is so good at Addition? Does he take private tuitions? Which teacher? What phone number? What fees?”
M2: “Private tuitions at Nursery? No no no. He is like born intelligent. Plus FYI, we were in US for 10 years. It’s all about nutritious food intake you know – Spiralized Cucumber and Jicama Tostada Salad with Avocado, Mediterranean Chicken, Curried Butternut Squash Soup, Lemon-Pepper Salmon, etc…..”
M3: “So you prepare these yourself? How do you manage time?”
M2: “No no no. I don’t know how to cook. We had a private chef. But now we aren’t allowing outside help.”
M3: “So…”
M2: “Now I just give him Maggi thrice a day.”
M2: “Oh…”
Meanwhile M1: “Can someone help me with private tuitions? My son keeps writing 1 + 1 = 11.”

Well, the WhatsApp groups also address ancillary issues that indirectly impact school and performance.

M1: My maid hasn’t turned in today. And my in-laws are such slow and useless fellows.
M2: Oh my husband is so insensitive….He has office meetings the entire day. All he does is pay the school fees, a few EMIs and a bunch of utility bills.
M3: We are visiting Italy this summer. I need a month off from school.
M4: Blush..blush…I am pregnant once again. We wanted two children at least. What if a single child disowns you later?

While parents strive and struggle to outshine each other in this fierce rat-race, they press their children to study more, participate more and perform better, often beyond their child’s  capacity. Especially, at the tender age of 4 Yrs. – 5 Yrs. when they still believe that Pinocchio and the Tooth Fairy are real deals.